But you don't hear me though...

You won't hear me now. So I will write to you here. I'll ramble here... churn my heart until it stops aching. Words. What words will heal this pain? I just write mindlessly hoping to find that catharsis, some peace, some sleep.

Now I see your pain, unobscured by my own. Now I've cast off my anger. Now I feel like I could present myself to you and feel safe - or at least, not be afraid. But you won't hear me now. You want me to disappear. Erase me.

I spent years crafting an intricate lockbox with an impossible combination and dangerous traps. And for what?! I would easily trade that safety for another whirl, another risk with you.

I am so foolish. So heartless. I didn't see the beauty of what you were offering. I was so blinded.

I'll always remember your eyes. I love your eyes. Especially when you loved me. I could see it in the way you looked at me sometimes. I felt so full.

Sometimes when one is so happy one forgets what else is possible. I'm nothing now. I'm nothing at all. I worked hard for you. I wanted a future. I wanted to make you proud. But I failed because I couldn't see my own darkness and how it was destroying us.

Time will heal all wounds but I don't want to heal yet. I don't want to forget you. I don't want to stop feeling for you. I want to hold you in my heart and arms again. It feels right. My skin tingles and my whole being relaxes. It feels right.

I needed to narrow my scope. Forget the world and everybody else. It's you and me, darling. It's you and me. We could do anything.